Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Keeping it together after Election Defeats

Let me put it kindly: Tony Sutton is not only an idiot, but he should be thrown off a bridge for insinuating that Mark Ritchie, our Secretary of State, would condone election corruption!
by Charlie Leck

Well, I’ve received quite a few emails and a couple of phone calls, wondering where today’s blog is. All the communicators assumed I would have been ranting and raging at a pretty high pitch today – after yesterday’s election results.

Not I!

I decided to allow some time to pass by and myself to cool down. I went to the gym and had a good workout this morning. My trainer wanted to talk politics. I refused. He interpreted my refusal as a rebuff and promptly raised all my various weight-lifting exercises by 10 pounds and put me through a much more vigorous stretching regimen.

Everything seemed fine right up until I began my rowing exercises very nearby a portable radio that someone always sets up in the place. Who did I hear, but Tony Sutton, the idiotic head of the state Republican Party? My blood began to boil. My trainer backed off a little and went off to find his luke-warm cup of coffee.

The Republicans won just about everything in sight here in Minnesota last night. The exceptions were a few state-wide constitutional contests such as the Attorney General, the State Auditor and the Governor’s office. Sutton, as goofy as anyone I know in the state of Minnesota, was charging the Democrats with election corruption.

Here’s how the journalist, JayWeiner, put it in this morning’s edition of MinnPost [click here to read the entire story].

“Tony Sutton never minces his words. Never.

“But this morning, the boisterous Minnesota Republican Party chair, with a twinkle in his eye and fire in his belly, did himself one better. He sliced, diced and filleted Tuesday's gubernatorial election, called Secretary of State Mark Ritchie names, said "we're not going to get rolled again" in a recount process — as if the GOP was rolled in the 2008 Al Franken-Norm Coleman saga — and otherwise blew his top at an opening-salvo news conference.

I was furious as I listened to Sutton imply that the Democratic Party in Minnesota is made up of a bunch of cheats. Geez, Tony, if we were going to cheat we would have done it better than the results of last night indicate. Are you totally crazy! You sliced us and diced us and spit us out with total contempt. You now control both the Senate and the House in Minnesota and that’s something you haven’t done for many, many decades.

Tony, the only guy I know who is crazier, and blows harder, than you just came within 9,000 votes of being elected our governor.

Already this morning, the Republican Party had hired a “big city lawyer” to come in here to Hickville. They’re bringing in a lawyer who was the chairman of the Federal Election Commission under George W..

Tony, breathing harder than I was under my load of weights, was babbling that “something doesn’t smell right.” Maybe it’s your armpits, Tony. My guess is that you didn’t get much sleep last night and you probably didn’t shower either.

Minnesota takes great pride in its elections, Tony. We have bigger turnouts and more efficient voting techniques here than any other state in the nation. Up here, we regard the vote as a near sacred matter. We encourage everyone to vote – even those who we know will vote differently than we’d like.

You just made an enormous fool of yourself this morning, Tony. No, change that! You made an enormous ass of yourself! Democrats stand with you in wanting the election to be above any sense of doubt. We won’t fight a recount if one is called for by law. And, we think that recount ought to be supervised by the best lawyers and political scientists your money can buy – er, I mean “pay for.”

I believe Mark Dayton should be sworn in with no doubt in Minnesota about his constitutional right to take that oath. And you know what, Tony? Mark Ritchie feels the same way. You owe the man an apology, Tony! You really do!

In the meantime, Tony, let me introduce you to my trainer. Losing a little weight would be good for your blood pressure.

[Added 6:30 A.M., 4 Nov 2010]
The video discussed above can be seen at the StarTribune web site:


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