Canning Tomatoes and the House of Representatives

The majority in the House of Representatives thinks it owns Washington – the entire country – and it forgets the whole business about the balance of power and the rights of the people to determine their future. They ought to get canned, these bastards.
by Charlie Leck

I actually have a daughter who dislikes tomatoes and won’t eat them in their freshest form. Oh, she’ll indulge in pasta sauces, thinking they’re swell; but she’ll recoil in disgust at the idea of pulling a big, juicy tomato off the vine and, after wiping it off a bit, biting into it as if it were a succulent apple right from the tree. I can’t believe it! She won’t allow a tiny, pretty, tasty cherry tomato to be placed on her salad. It’s un-American. It’s tragic. What is more glorious in all of horticulture than the lush, wonderful, fresh Tomato?

It’s tomato canning time. The vines are still full and we can’t keep up with the big fellows. The farmers markets are running their course and will soon be closing down; yet they have hundreds upon hundreds of tomatoes to sell us for remarkably reduced prices. Autumn time weather is on the verge here. A NY Times column of September 10, by Cathy Barrow, explains the fundamentals of canning tomatoes so that you can still enjoy the wonder of them here in Minnesota come January and February. [Enjoy the column by clicking here!]

I’ve hunted high and low for advice about how we might can the House of Representatives in the current U.S. Congress. In fact, I’ve found out, that it is too late because they are mostly beyond the period of ripeness and have grown rotten and worthless. They have no value anymore and – those rotten ones – but to be separated out and trampled underfoot.

The loonier (rotten) members of Congress hold fast to the idea of shutting down the economy of the United States by refusing to pass a budget and refusing to renew the rights and ability of the nation to handle its debt. They’ll relent, of course, if the House and Senate agree to repeal the Affordable Health Care Act even though that bill was pass constitutionally by the elected legislative representatives of the people of the United States and signed into law by President of the United States.

Republican Senator John McCain is shaking his head at the stupidity. From his place in the Senate, he shouts over at the rebel representatives in the House that Obamacare is the law of the land and it’s not going to be repealed. McCain assures the House and the American people that the Senate will not pass any kind of law that stops or repeals the Affordable Health Care Act from going into law. Yet, a significant minority of the House continues to try to blackmail the system and the people by telling them it will shut down the government if it doesn’t get its way (which is a repeal of the law). Talk about children stomping their feet and demanding their right to breakfast every morning on Lucky Charms!

The stubborn stupidity of the minority to think their opinions outweigh the rights of the majority of the people is not the way America is supposed to work. These are the same politicians who scream about upholding a literal interpretation of the Constitution of the United States.

I can no longer call you fools “gentlemen” so I must address you this way…

“Look, you miserable, rotten, idiots, the American people want everyone to have health care insurance that works. We think it is a right of the individual – each individual – to be assured proper health care. Now tend to other matters of government and let’s get going here. It’s the way democracy works – the majority has spoken! You have no right to blackmail the American people! You have no right to stomp your feet, shutting down the U.S. government.”

Geez, they ought to get canned!

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