Saturday, February 7, 2009

Searching for Helen Philpot

I still believe Helen & Margaret are a couple of young girls at Smith!
by Charlie Leck

Helen and Margaret write one of the most popular blogs on the web. They are a couple of very elderly, old girls -- both are in their 80s -- and they have millions of readers.

It’s Helen who does most of the posting. When Margaret does write, one really can pick up the style difference between the two. Very recently, Helen has been reviewing, chapter by chapter, Ann Coulter's newest book, Guilty. An example of her quick and rapier style wit and her brilliant writing is demonstrated in the review of chapter three of Coulter's work. [read it] This writing, it seems to me, comes from a professional and I think that's what the actual person behind Helen really is.

Oh what the hell, I’ll still go and read the frauds (if they are frauds) because they’re funny, fun and witty. I'll just keep pretending that they are old broads who have hit on extraordinary success.

There are a number of things, however, that keep making me think they’re phony. The syntax and vocabulary slips from time to time and sounds much too young for a couple of old geezers.

Though some people claim they can’t find any anyone with those names in the regions in which they’re supposed to live, those folks must have missed Helen’s explanation that they are writing under pen-names because Helen’s grandson thought it would provide them more security. It all gets much too complex and only underlines the feeling they are fictional.

If these two old girls were for real, they’d have been invited to speak at some of the most popular colleges and universities in America. Big money in that, girls! I'd travel pretty far to see the two of them in person and to hear them speak.

The fictional Helen Philpot (they’ve changed names for security reasons, as I mention above) was born in 1926. She would have entered college in about 1926 or ’27 and gotten out in about 1932. Yet, she reminisces recently about Cliff Notes Books which didn’t appear on or around college campuses until 1958. I guess there’s no reason why she wouldn’t have seen them around the bookstores!

Well, real or not, Helen kept me highly entertained all during the campaign (the months and months and months of it) and I kind of fell in love with her. If she turns out to be a fake, it won’t be the first time I was jilted by a bogus dame.

And, Helen keeps on cooking, even now that the race is over and part of history. She loves to take on the Coulter chick and Rush Limbaugh, too.

I’m confused about the question we’re working on here. What do you think? Are they the real deal? Or are they a couple of goofy, funny girls at Smith?


  1. If she was born in 26, she wouldn't have entered college in 26.

  2. She'd have entered in 44/45, graduated in 49. I'm 54 and use a lot of phrases/syntax I've picked up off the Internet and TV, along with many younger friends. My late MIL passed at 80 this spring. I never noticed any real difference in her language than mine, or her youngest daughter. Of course, sh volunteered with her church, had grandkids-both blood and "adopted" which kept her much younger than her years. I'm watching Stefanie Miller right now- 51 years old- and she just referred to an asswaffle. Helen answers comments on her blog, and all the stylistic problems people seem to have with her "reality" could very well be an effect of reading hundreds of comments. I know my style has evolved from what I used in high school or college.
    Oh, I think Helen is a real old lady. Margaret OTOH is either a reluctant partner in this, going senile, or faked. Though I think her comments have changed over the years I've been reading. Quite possibly Margaret used to contribute, but health, interest, or death has the grandson (or Helen herself) ghost writing it.

  3. I know a professional in Austin who was approached by the guy who created this blog. As much as I love the blog, and it pains me to say this: There is no Helen. There is no Margaret. There is no grandson. I for one continue to read and enjoy the commentary, but I will never give a penny to the site.