Sunday, October 28, 2012

Easy on Sunday Morning

Some Sundays are better’n others! Today is particularly good because the sports section of the paper isn’t so glum after a big Gopher victory over Purdue in football; yet some sports writers can’t seem to churn out anything unless it’s downbeat and punishing – even after such a wonderful victory.
by Charlie Leck

I think you have to be a certain type to be a sportswriter or columnist. Y’gotta be a mean son-of-a-bitch – downright mean and nasty.

I decided to avoid the first section of the paper this morning. As a matter of fact, I’m not going to think about politics again until tomorrow morning. I’m gonna have a nice, quiet, easy Sunday morning and I think I might just go to church to hear some good music (a la maestro Philip Brunelle). Perhaps, if Jim Gertmenian is preaching, I’ll also get something meaty to chew on. Maybe I’ll say a word of thanks, too!

For now, however, I just want to read the sports section and revel in the fact that the University of Minnesota’s football team, ‘til now with zero victories in three Big Ten Conference tries, has won a game against a conference rival. Sweet!

The Gophers poured it on a mentally unprepared team yesterday – a team that had been reading about how terrible the Minnesota team is – a team that had glanced at the Minnesota record of loses to Iowa (31-13), Northwestern (21-13) and Wisconsin (38-13) – and thought they’d come in here and enjoy the autumn fresh air, play a little football and then jump on the big jet back to whatever the hell town Purdue University is in, anyway, with a something big to 13 victory. In other words, they weren’t mentally prepared for what actually hit them yesterday afternoon – a young, freshman kid named Philip Nelson. The final score was 44 for the Gophers and 28 for Purdue – and 21 of those points for the visitors came after Coach Jerry Kill started sending in some of his second-stringers to get them some experience.

I keep wanting to spell Purdue as perdu, the French word for lost – or wasted, missing, gone, or dead.

I’d watched Purdue play remarkable losing games against very reputable opponents in the last few weeks – Notre Dame, Ohio State, Michigan and Wisconsin – and thought they were certainly good enough to come in here and humble our team. When they scored the first touchdown of the game, with what seemed remarkable ease, I sat back in my chair and said, “Oh, no! Not this again!”

But then, young Mr. Nelson took over and put on a passing exhibition that we’ve not seen around here in a long, long time – touchdown, touchdown, touchdown! Nelson got his defensive buddies all excited and they began playing like they were the better team – interception and touchdown! Field goal! Field goal!

Before I even began thinking about getting dinner started, the Gophers were up 44 to 7. Coach Kill began sending in young defensive players so he could watch them and “get some film on them,” as they say in the trade. Purdue (la perte) awoke from their sommeil (sleep) and put a few points on the board; however, Minnesota made them do it slow enough that the clock was now the greatest enemy (ennemi) of la perte.

As for me, I am once again a big Gopher fan. I think I’ll dig out that maroon hat with the big, gold M on it and wander around, up and down the sidewalks of Lyndale (My Town – mon ville) today.

If you go to our local paper today, to examine the sports section, skip the Jim Souhan column. He must be terribly constipated, or something, because he just can’t relax and smile and enjoy himself. The only thing he’s any good at is griping – he is the best of the gripes (il est le meilleur de coliques)!


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